My Playmate Posing Days are OVER

As I was reading the Playboy magazine that resides in our restroom this morning, yes i'm sorry for that visual of me sitting on the potty reading a magazine, I came to a sort of sad conclusion.

I won't ever get to pose in Playboy. I never really thought that it was something that I would actually do, and well my body would need to lose some more lbs before I would be really considered for such an honor. But I am not really a modest person, and hell if I had the chance to do it, or was asked, I would totally agree in a heartbeat.

But anyways, back to my rambling. Now that I now have some more incisions gracing my tummy from that damn appendix that I apparently didn't need, and was inflamed and didn't want my body anymore, my tummy probably isn't up to Playboy standards. I didn't see ANY scars gracing all of the playboy models that I have seen in the magazine since Dru and I have been together, and it has started living in my restroom.

Playboy models don't have surgery scars. They don't have gross incisions. They have perfect flat stomachs, with nice abs. They have cute bellybuttons, and flawless skin. I know that I am being very superficial in my findings. And probably analyze these models more than my loving hubby does.

But a girls gotta dream, right? And my playboy dreams have been crushed!

But the stories are still good in the magazine *yes I read for the stories, not the naked women*, and I will try hard to not judge the beautiful women that live in my bathroom anymore. Because I am going to take a much deserved nap!


  1. Don't worry, they're all airbrushed to death! You can still do it if you REALLY want to :)

  2. LOL I agree..never underestimate the power of the airbrush!

  3. Ebess, just look at pics of tara reid's stomach in real life and compare them to the magazine. you will be FLOORED. Photoshop fixes everything!

  4. Yes you CAN girlfriend. They can airbrush a little scar like that faster than Hef can secure new young blonde girlfriends!