Keep on Keeping On

I figured it was about time I replace my sad pathetic post with something better. It’s been long enough. I’m not going to lie and say that I am in a great happy place, because I’m not, but we are working on getting there. It’s new doctors and new uncharted territory, so we’ll see where this puts us.

In other news, I’ve been working at my new job for almost 2 months and I couldn’t be happier. I have a smart, witty, down to earth boss who I actually enjoy working with. Our clients are awesome sweet ladies, who I find myself relating to and learning from. They are some kick ass bloggers that have stories and have lived through things I could never ever imagine. I count my blessings that I was able to find a position like this, doing what I love and interacting online.

Even though I am in a pretty dark place, I’m happy. I’m happy to have my loving husband who enjoys renting Bad Teacher on a Tuesday night while eating popcorn for dinner. Chips and Salsa with beer and wine are completely acceptable meals around these parts (we don’t have small mouths to feed, I can drink my dinner if I want to) and that makes me happy. I’m not gearing up for a sugar fest costume meltdown on Monday. In fact, I’m thinking about being scrooge mc scrooge and turning the lights off and going to the movies or something.

I’m learning to accept that you know what, I might not have kids. And if we do, it’s going to be a bitch to get there so I might as well be me while I still can. I’m willing to make sacrifices for what I want, as is Dru…but if things don’t end up working out in the long term, I’ll know that I have Captain Stan, Molly and Dru right by my side. 

Tears

Tears...streaming down my face and leaving me at a loss of what to do. I had thought that my body “had it” this time. That I was getting better and that I was fully capable of becoming a mommy. Lab Reports = not the same results. The lab results from my blood test came back as a huge slap in the face, you will never be a mother and we don’t know why type of result. So here I sit, feeling broken and sad for things that are completely out of my control. Wondering if I should blame this on the endometriosis or something else? Wondering what to do next…

Wife of the Year Award

Since I’m pretty sure that my post yesterday about laundry earned me wife of the year status, I’d like to share with you what I did today.

I mopped the floors! Yes, you read that right. And I not only mopped, I did it on my hands and knees with a bucket (or bowl, I couldn’t find a bucket that wasn’t more disgusting than my floors) and bleach and a sponge.

We haven’t had a proper mop since we moved into this house (2.5 years ago, I’m ashamed to admit this). I break mops, and I just feel like I am always moving filth around on the floor. No bueno if you ask me. I’ve always been ashamed of how dirty I thought that our floors are. And between the shedding that Stan, Molly and I do we had some nasty ass floors. The 5 second rule should never ever be applicable in this house. Until today!

I scrubbed, on my hands and knees - the whole kitchen and hallway. And damn it looks good. My hands are another story…I also didn’t have any gloves J

Normal Non-Wrinkly Hand

Bleach Ravaged Gross Hand

The wife of the week award officially goes to me – especially since I am making a homemade dinner consisting of pork chops, apples and probably potatoes (that’s what Dru wants).

How do you mop? Or how do you not mop? It’s cool, we are all friends – please tell me that I’m not the only one who pushed filth around for almost 3 years.

A Stinky Situation

We have a hate/hate relationship with laundry in this house. As in, we both HATE doing laundry. It has turned into a nasty stinky competition (literally) between Dru and I.

I start to get frustrated when his laundry is overflowing in the hamper in our bedroom, so he starts a load. Notice that I said “start”…Thing is, it sits in the washing machine until one of us decides that we need to do laundry again. Did you know that laundry that sits in the washer starts to stink up the machine as well as the clothes? Well come to my house and smell me, because Dru and I are teaching each other a lesson when it comes to laundry. We both wear stinky clothes now, because we don’t want to admit that we suck at laundry.

I even go as far as drying his clothes that sit in the washer for 2 days even though I know they stink and then tell him he has to wear them because it’s wasteful to rewash J Yes, I’m evil, but he does the same to me. I won’t let him dry my clothes, because I don’t dry all of them and there is nothing worse than clothes that are too tight after being washed.

Please tell me that other couples do this. It’s normal, right? Everyone wears stinky clothes because they are either a) too lazy to change the laundry b) full of pride and kind of an asshole c) both?

Did I mention that the laundry room is in the basement? The next house that we live in WILL have laundry on the same floor as our bedroom. 

Driving a Boat in Circles = Marital Stress

I’m still recovering from my Monday morning epic fail of locking myself out of the house, but the weather around here has definitely been helping. It’s been in the low 80’s the past 2 days, and it’s expected to be that nice again today. Did I mention that I live in Minnesota? And it’s October 5^th…

I Love, Love warm weather like this. No humidity, beautiful crisp fall colors and no bugs. What more could you ask for?

With the weather being so nice yesterday and Dru having the day off work we decided to take the boat out on the lake for some spousal bonding (fishing). I now know why men usually go fishing without women – they have a penis and can easily pee while boating, I don’t have a penis and have the bladder of a pregnant lady (no I’m not pregnant, see wine mention later).  

Sounds simple right – almost like I just solved world peace or something? But I swear that I pee at least every half hour, and we were out enjoying the beautiful day for over 2 hours. I DID have my bathing suit on, but that water isn’t exactly as warm as you would expect. In fact, I’m pretty sure that my bladder would have seized up if I got in and then I would have been wet and cold (and still would have had to pee).

Want to know what else I learned? That driving a boat with a motor on the back isn’t as intuitive as you would think (at least to me). Dru let me drive the boat yesterday and I think that we both feared for our lives the whole time. WTF I didn’t know that you have to drive with your left hand or that going in circles isn’t normal, or that sudden jerks can cause the boat to capsize (this didn’t happen, but was going to if I didn’t stop driving). A tip for the ladies, just don’t drive. It will cause less marital stress and then you can sit up front and drink wine with one hand while trying to support your boobs with the other. Yes, I did say support your boobs. I didn’t realize that it would be like the ocean out there and that I would need a sports bra for an evening ride across the lake.   

We didn’t catch any fish, but it was a nice night spent with the hubby. 

I'm surprised I haven't seen the police this am!

Monday’s have received a bad reputation – righteously so!

I was going to meet my gym partner at the gym at 6:30 am. No reason I shouldn’t have been able to make it on time. I went to bed at a decent hour and my bed partner had left so incredibly early (2am, he had to work early) that I had ample time to get back to sleep once disturbed from my slumber and to reopen the window (this will be key info later in the morning).

I awoke at 6:50 – first fail of the morning. Well I decided to still go to the gym. I got dressed and ready to leave until I realized that I had asked Dru ever so nicely to take my car to work because it needed gas. Gas at his work is about .20 cents cheaper than anywhere else, so it was a win-win. I found his truck keys and locked the door behind me – so any crazy stalkers couldn’t steel my kitties while I was gone for an hour. Second fail of the morning!

If you know Dru, you know that he is a freak about locking doors/windows and keeping our family and myself safe. It is sweet – but so incredibly annoying to me. I’m more of the mind set “if they want it, they can have it”. They being any home invasion specialists. I would rather they had an easy access to our stuff than breaking windows/doors to enter. My loving husband doesn’t appreciate my mindset. So we lock up around here at our Casa. Fine, whatever. I entertain his crazy habits and just go along with it as routine. Which bit me in the ass this am.

I had a great workout, and then decided to NEVER go to the gym at 7am again. It means that I leave for home at 8am. Do you know what 8am means? Kids go to school…I don’t have kids and I don’t realize things like this! My gym is a community center connected to the local middle school. It was drop off time and I was CRANKY because I hate to wait and I hate traffic. Small town mentality – but I shouldn’t have to wait in traffic if I live in a town with less than 10,000 people.

Anyways, I made it home. Parked in the back (that’s where the truck lives) and went to the front door with keys in hand. Remember how I was driving Dru’s truck? Well the idiot (said with love) didn’t have house keys on his key ring…WTF!!

I checked the door just to make sure that I did actually lock it, and it was locked. Our house was locked up like Fort Knox. What’s a girl to do? Go around to the front where our bedroom window is open and beg the kitties to let me in? Yes that was the first step. Didn’t work! Stan and Molly are smart, but not THAT smart. So I did what any other sane human being would do.

Cursed my husband and thanked god that I like to sleep with a window open. Pried the screen off, checked the street and wiggled my butt in the window. Fell headfirst, ripped my workout pants and bruised my neither regions…

Monday Morning Fail!!!